Where do you stand and how would I know?

Some time has passed since the election and the dark cloud still looms. I come across stories in my Facebook news feed everyday of horrendous crimes against gay people. This morning I read of a 75 year old man in Florida that was dragged out of his car and beaten in front of his home. The attacker had targeted him because he had a Human Rights Campaign sticker on his car. While he punched the senior citizen he declared “My new president says we can kill faggots now”.

                Every day I see a new story and I have noticed that when I speak about them to my family I get an immediate and strong reaction.  “Why are you reading those stories!?” , “Stop looking at that stuff!”, and of course “Get off of Facebook!”. These reactions frustrate and disappoint me. Of course I see that they are coming from a place of protection and love. My family doesn’t want me thinking about the fact that a large number of people would torture and kill me if they had the chance. I suppose it is safe to assume that they do not want to think about it either.

                I’m really struggling with this tactic. It actually seems counterproductive to me and I admit that the suggestion frankly makes me angry. Why would I make the choice to ignore such terrible events? These are real people, who have been victimized while going about their business for the sole reason that some insecure homophobe is terrified of their own sexuality. Is the proper response to ignore these things until they affect me personally? Yes, that is when it becomes a topic of conversation that is worthy of ruining the day. Perhaps that is and has always been the biggest challenge when it comes to staring hatred and evil in the face and saying no. Until something has directly affected us we usually ignore it.

                Of course I have no idea what to do about it. March and chant? Yeah that makes an impact for a day and people love to agree with you when you’re on the street corner yelling for equal rights. But the true test is on a daily basis. Do you smile at the transgender person serving you at the coffee shop or do you avoid eye contact? Do you talk about and express how you feel when someone is victimized? These are the true tests. Martin Luther King said “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”


Where do you stand and how would I know?